Tag Archives: Miscellany

How to write a novel in 3000 days or less



1. Write the first sentence.

2. Erase the first sentence.

3. Write a chapter and convince yourself you’ll win a Pulitzer.

4. Re-read it and throw into trash.

5. Dig through the trash after it’s covered with greasy leftovers to think about it some more.

6. Think about it for a couple of years.

7. Resurrect the idea and drop all other commitments and interests.

8. Convince yourself that it’s total crap.

9. Give it a middle and ending and rewrite the beginning.

10. Send it into the universe.

I’m almost to #10!

Are those Facebook tests fake?

I’m thinking yes.

I’ve got 100% correct on the last four or five I’ve taken. I mean I know I can kill it in grammar and US geography, and I was pretty confident with the Catholic vocabulary one, but I just got 100% on ’80s song lyrics and those of you who have heard me sing in the car know I make up words when I don’t know them and hum through most everything but the chorus. I made a total guess on at least half of them.

It didn’t work in economics or science class so I’m not sure how I could get so lucky on these tests. Is this some kind of booby trap? Would love your thoughts.

BTW, I’m middle-of-the-night blogging again. Maybe I should start a new novel.